This Stays Between Us
This Stays Between Us is THE podcast where best friends Chrys and Riss, two Brazilian girls living in the US, dive into all the things that make life interesting, hilarious, and sometimes downright ridiculous. Every episode is a no-holds-barred conversation about dating, life’s ups and downs, funny stories, books, and the latest buzz in pop culture. With a mix of humor, candidness, and authentic connection, this podcast is the perfect blend of heart and laughs.
Chrys and Riss bring their unique perspectives as immigrants navigating life in the States, and they share their experiences through lighthearted chats and deep discussions. Whether they’re sharing stories from their past, debating the latest Netflix show, or reflecting on the complexities of modern dating, every episode is a relatable and entertaining experience.
This Stays Between Us is all about keeping it real—no topic is off-limits, and the vibe is always laid-back and fun. The podcast brings listeners into the heart of their friendship, offering a behind-the-scenes look at two best friends who just happen to have a lot to say. So whether you’re here for the laughs, the stories, or just to hear two friends share their thoughts on the world around them, you’ll find something to love.
Tune in to This Stays Between Us for a podcast full of honesty, humor, and maybe just a little bit of gossip—but hey, it stays between us, right?
This Stays Between Us
Just Between Us... Boobs, Mormons, and Magic Muscle Patches
Crys shares her journey to getting a breast reduction, including an awkward consultation with the surgeon and dealing with insurance complications for her 32K cup size. The medical necessity debate highlights the physical toll of large breasts, including back pain and daily discomfort.
• Crys and Riss discuss their experiences with skincare treatments like retinol and chemical peels, sharing horror stories of peeling faces and makeup disasters
• Both hosts strongly advocate for proper showering habits and criticize trends of infrequent washing
• The period disc gets enthusiastic endorsements from both hosts as a life-changing menstrual product that reduces cramps and eliminates leaks
• Motherhood struggles get a candid examination, including breastfeeding difficulties, postpartum body changes, and the unequal burden on mothers
• Crystal reviews "The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives" reality show, critiquing the manufactured drama and questionable ethics of filming therapy sessions
Follow us on TikTok @therealtsbu, subscribe on YouTube, and let us know what topics you'd like us to cover next!
all right. So this is what the internet is mad about this week. Welcome to another episode of this day's between us, where we roast what's trending welcome back.
Speaker 2:Okay, we're gonna be talking, we're gonna be making some confessions and we're gonna be reading some confessions, I guess. Um, as you notice, our studio is has upgraded so cute. It's been such a journey getting everything ready for this.
Speaker 1:Hopefully it'll continue to get better. Yes, it's a sign might fall at any moment, because as we try to put the anchors in, uh, they got pushed into the wall further in, so I don't know what happened there all we can say is that if you know any set designer looking for a job, we don't pay well, but we have work for free.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we definitely have some work they can do. We need help. Um, yeah, special shout out to my mom for helping me put the wallpaper up. Uh, we did get in a few fights but we're good now okay, it brought you closer together at the end of the day probably I had to finish the work with my boyfriend. He was nicer to me, he has more to lose.
Speaker 1:That makes sense no, they.
Speaker 2:They were great help. I'm glad they were here to help. Um, yeah, but I'm very excited. I feel like our little studio is shaping up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I think the audio is getting better, the video is getting better.
Speaker 2:So slow improvements, yeah, slow and steady yeah, let us know if there's anything that you think we need to add or change to our little setup here, or just compliment us.
Speaker 1:That helps.
Speaker 2:That helps too yeah, tell us we're doing great. Um, okay, crystal. Something I'm really curious to know about is about your journey with the boob reduction. That hasn't started, yeah, well, what was that? I know you went to a consultation, so what was that all like?
Speaker 1:yeah, so, um, I actually had a roommate who got a breast reduction like forever ago and so well, and my sister got like some plastic surgery too after having kids. So I asked her first and then she gave me a recommendation. I called them in 2023 to schedule an appointment. That appointment was for august of 2025. No, it's still in the Way it was so long ago that I don't even have their number to call back to confirm the time or the date.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh, yeah, they were that far booked yeah.
Speaker 1:That is crazy. Just for the consultation, not even the surgery that could. I don't even know. That probably would be in like 2040. I might be dead. I know there's no guarantee they'll still have a client. I might be in the ground or cremated somewhere by the time they have an appointment for me, but yeah.
Speaker 1:But then I reached out to one of my roommates and I was like I know, just the boobies with me, um, but yeah, I reached out to one of my old roommates and she was like, oh, you should go to this guy and I actually was able to schedule an appointment within like a couple months, which was really good, yeah, and I went in and I always wear like a minimizer bra because I just they're too big at this point. It has to be like a sports bra or whatever. And if anyone is struggling with this, I did find some really good ones on Amazon after searching for years, literally, but, um, have you tried?
Speaker 2:like I know TikTok's got some that they keep pushing out. Have you tried those? Yeah?
Speaker 1:Well, I don't like the ones with the wire under it, because it like ends up just digging into you and not having that much coverage. Yeah, I found some that are they don't have a wire and they have like a coverage up here. So then, like your boobs are not trying to escape from the top which sometimes mine do, yeah, so those have worked out pretty good.
Speaker 1:I just barely got them in the middle like a month ago and I've been wearing them. They've been good. So I went for my appointment and they were really, really nice. And when it's kind of awkward because you have to like, obviously, take your top off, and then this nurse was like we're gonna go into this room and we're going to take some pictures, I'm like great.
Speaker 2:Just please don't post them on the internet.
Speaker 1:Is this blackmail? So I get the surgery done here, Like.
Speaker 2:I don't know If you find any other surgeon. These will be posted on.
Speaker 1:Facebook, I know, Anyway, but she was nice. She's like we're're gonna make sure that your face is cropped. We're just taking pictures and then so she's making small talk with me, as she's like okay, now turn to the left. Okay, now center, Now turn to the right, Now do this. And I'm just like hanging and she's talking to me and I'm like this is so like uncomfy and they're all just going in her ipad and I'm like okay.
Speaker 2:and she's just like how was your weekend?
Speaker 1:you're just, you got your boobs out like I don't know, I feel like you could tell my future right now just by looking at my boobies. Also, I noticed that her ipad, the screensaver, was a picture of her with, like her husband on her wedding day or something, and I'm just thinking like I hope this is not a personal ipad just imagine her kid later on like trying to play minecraft or whatever game, just swiping through.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so uncomfy, so funny.
Speaker 1:And it was funny too because she took me back to the other room and then she was just showing like it made sense, because she was like I'm going to show you some pictures of some of the surgeries that we've done and so you have an idea of what to expect, and like some people go like smaller than others and whatnot.
Speaker 1:And so she's showing me a couple of pictures and explaining what the um incision would look like. Basically they call it like the lollipop or whatever what that incision that like around your nips and then down and then like a smiley face around it and that's how they like remove it and then move stuff up. And so I I kind of understood that already because I've done some research, not a lot, but like just enough to be like where do I go to cut these off? And like please help, um, yeah, so she's just showing me them and I'm like, oh, okay, yeah, I know that makes sense. Uh, that looks good, I get it. And then she's like keep showing me picture. I don't know if she was like trying to buy time for the doctor, but she was showing me pictures of boobs for like 45 minutes.
Speaker 2:I'm not even lying, she's just scrolling more and I'm like, okay, I've never seen so many boobs, I know, I know.
Speaker 1:This just feels weird now.
Speaker 2:Like I got the point like five pictures ago.
Speaker 1:I know and like all you have to do is like, really just show me like one person Like this was before, this was after, this is after like a year. That makes sense, but everyone was like before, right after, after a year, Like so many different boobs I probably saw, like all of utah valley's boobs the full album.
Speaker 2:You're just gonna see people like walking around and be like, oh, those are the boobs nice lollipop very good.
Speaker 1:Um, yeah, it was just kind of awkward. And the doctor came in and had me like open it. Well, he was looking at me and talking to me for a while and then he had me open up the gown and then he was like, oh, I see what you're talking about and I'm like thank you for validating me, but at the same time that was too heavy on the oh, like I would appreciate, like okay, I understand. But like oh, yeah, I understand. But like oh, yeah, sir, you're getting reported for that. It's like okay, you just lost a star in that review. We'll see how the rest of this is gonna go. But also just awkward because he'd like and I get that, it's just the situation I didn't.
Speaker 1:It's not like I felt like violated, it was just like weird but yeah no, picked up one of my boobs and he's like squishing it and moving it around and I'm just like right here staring at him like okay, you're like trying to not make eye contact.
Speaker 2:It's like that is so funny. It's like usually a man buys me dinner first.
Speaker 1:I know it's like yeah, come on, at least dessert, I don't know a soda, anything, yeah. So he was just doing that for a while and there was another lady there and like I think just for compliance or whatever which, and it wasn't like he wasn't disrespectful, it was just like he was doing his thing. But I just know it was my first time, so I'm like, okay, no cool, do you need the other one too?
Speaker 2:you're, like the other one's, feeling left out. Now I know seriously yeah anyway.
Speaker 1:So it was kind of awkward and but it's fine, and he was like, yeah, just asking me a bunch of questions. Oh, the other thing that he said, this also hurt my feelings, doctors have a way of doing that, and I don't think he was trying to be mean, but it was mean because he's doing that and then he out of nowhere just grabs, like my fat here on my back, and he's like, oh, and we probably want some lipo right here. And I'm like, okay, like sure cut whatever you don't like.
Speaker 2:Oh, my gosh, that's like me. When I went to the dentist and the dentist like well, you could use some filler. I'm like dude, I'm here for my teeth it totally made me think of that.
Speaker 1:I'm like stop trying to upsell me like my self-esteem is in the garbage already I'm not here for my cheekbones. I left all all my self-esteem on that iPad from the other nurse Like come on, anyway.
Speaker 1:So that was awkward. Oh, that's so funny, anyway, yeah, so we wrapped it up and then I went into this little room with this lady and she was, I guess, the person who schedules the surgeries and like deals with the billing and stuff. So I was just asking her some questions because I was like, will this be like covered by insurance? Is this now in a pocket? And it was just really weird too, because she was like, did he say it was medically necessary? And I was like he didn't say it. But like they measured me and stuff and I know, based off of like things that I've read from my insurance, that it would be, um, just based on my size and whatnot, yeah, and so, um, what?
Speaker 1:are the qualifications for so at least through my insurance. From what I've read um it has you have to be'm like. I'm a band like 32 or 34, but my cup is a K, so I'm above that.
Speaker 1:I didn't even know I went that far. I didn't either. And when I was breastfeeding it was even larger and I was like I don't know what to do. This is so out of control. Yeah, because it must give you so many back problems, too endless. My neck hurts, my back hurts. I just, yeah, it's so heavy and yeah, I don't know. And when I was breastfeeding I sometimes would do the uh, hands-free one, because it's just easier, the ones that you put in your bra, but it's like this big and you're putting that inside your bra with your boobs. I was like I don't know.
Speaker 1:I need a tent or something to hold all this. I don't know how. Yeah, it's just like. It's like it looks like this what is it? It's a hands-free pump. Oh, a pump, yeah, okay. So you just put it like in your bra, uh-huh, put your nip in the right spot and then just start the thing. But yeah, so that was like unmanageable. But yeah, so it definitely was. And then another thing I read from the insurance is that they might have like a certain amount that they require you to take off, and it was like 500 grams per boob, which, from what I want, it's like a thousand off each at least, so it would qualify. But she was so rude about it. She's like, no, if you didn't say it's probably not. And looking at you right now, you probably don't qualify. And I'm like I'm wearing a sports bra. Trust that, once, girl. Trust just that once it unclicks, it got pictures on the ipad over there just take a look at those.
Speaker 1:I know seriously, yeah, so that was wild, yeah, it's an experience. And then she hands me the bill and she's like, yeah, without insurance, it's like fourteen thousand dollars. And I'm like, okay, I wasn't expecting that. Um, did she tell you what it would be with?
Speaker 1:insurance no, she. She showed me what the payment plan would be and then, with like without insurance, completely like just what would we do? And so I'm looking into it, I'm trying. I'm gonna go to my doctor and see if I can get something signed from them, because if I do, then I can take it back to the surgeon and then see what that would look like yeah, no, that would be wild if they didn't approve if it wasn't like covered by insurance, because that's definitely been like a journey for you and I know, yeah, the back issues is not something to be kidding around about.
Speaker 1:I know, I just want to run for you again one day maybe without them bobbing in the wind, bunch of me and giving me a black eye To it be nice. Yeah, yeah, that's crazy. And then today I'm just like on a journey now, but today I got Botox on my masters finally.
Speaker 1:Yeah, how is that feeling Good? I mean, it feels a little like numb. I think it feels a little different talking with it, but that's supposed to help too. So no more grinding my teeth and breaking my front tooth, hopefully. So, hey, there you go, just doing all the works, just fixing it up everything. Your skin is glowing, though, so thank you. Yeah, I also bought some makeup, some new like skincare stuff. I'm like trying to take care of myself more. Look at you. I have not done in a long time, which is, but yeah, I'm even like using retinol now.
Speaker 2:Wow, retinol. I've never had a good experience with retinol. It's breaking me up. I was gonna say it's always.
Speaker 2:There was this one time I went to I was in college and I had started using retinol. Because time I went to I was in college and I had started using retinol, because, I don't know, I got influenced into it. Yeah, I started using retinol and my I woke up one day and my face was just peeling all over the place and it's like winter. So I don't really have like a oh, I was just in the sun, sort of excuse, you know, but it was just it was. It looked so bad and I was like I can't not go to class, like I have to, yeah, and it's like the kind of thing that the more makeup you put on to cover it, like the worse it looks. Oh my gosh, I was mortified. I would like go to the bathroom every like 30 minutes to try and like I'd like get some of the skin off. But it was just yeah. And then after that I was like I don't think I can do the retinol.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think you have to ease into it. That happened to me actually. Um, I went to the dermatologist. I was having like some skin problems also like early in college, and she told me to get benzoyl peroxide, which works really well, but she told me to get like one that had like 10, which is apparently too high, and then I also fell asleep with it on my face so I made it even worse. But that happened to me. I was like peeling and then I put makeup on and I literally was at work and like my skin with my makeup was just like coming off of my face. Just go to the bathroom and it's like, oh cool, like I just have skin hanging. It was so bad. Yeah, it looked good after, but it was.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, the process is brutal. I did a chemical peel once and that was that's like what's supposed to happen, right, so like I expected it. But I was also like I hated it so much and then not picking. Yeah, like I hated it so much and I'm not picking. Yeah, well, you, you can't pick on at it and it, and it's so noticeable too and I don't know I, I it wasn't even a matter like I was almost trying to be confident, even like go around where I had to go and be confident or whatever but it was like that's not like that whole rule did not apply to that situation.
Speaker 1:It just looks like you have leprosy or something just trying to own it a hundred percent.
Speaker 2:And then it's like I felt fine being around my boyfriend, obviously like he didn't care, yeah, but then he like made plans with his brother's family and I was like, yeah, I was like I don't want people to see me. And there's like his nieces and nephews. I was like I don't want to be around kids when I look like this, I don't want to. They will destroy you, they will wreck me, and I also don't want to like give them nightmares. I don't want to be the scary girl their uncle brought around one time. Oh, that's tragic. It was, yeah, I feel that, but I survived.
Speaker 1:That's good. I'm a survivor. I'm glad you made it.
Speaker 2:It's tough.
Speaker 1:No, it was Chemical peels and all that. Oh yeah, have you ever had one? Yeah, I've done it a couple of times. Yeah, and it just yeah, same experience I'm.
Speaker 2:I'll be so honest, I'm bad and I pick at it because I'm like I'm just gonna get the skin that's like hanging, yeah.
Speaker 1:And then you pull just a little too much and you're like it's like with the red skin, it's raw.
Speaker 2:I have I always get scissors and I like start cutting up the skin.
Speaker 1:That's like not coordinated enough to not lose my nose but I've seen people do that but like the baby scissors, like the eyebrow ones yeah that's. That's probably better. Have you seen the girl? Um, there's this girl on tiktok that says that she's trying out the caveman skin. Yes, and it looks like she has doodoo on her face.
Speaker 1:Oh, she lying. She's like scar face girl. It's like a clay mask or something. And yeah, I saw that she ended it with like a brand deal with sarah v or something and like washing her face and it coming off and being like girl.
Speaker 1:I mean, I like it's like rage, but also like that's so stupid, because I saw the first video I saw of her. She was at the salon like getting her hair done, so she like committed. She was leaving the house with that junk on her face. I think she even went to like a wedding. Oh, she would get kicked out of my wedding, can you?
Speaker 2:imagine like is that contagious?
Speaker 1:yeah, and you know, like I mean she's probably not like a bridesmaid or like someone that's going to be in a lot of pictures, but imagine if she was. I'd be like you have to go home, yeah, or like, wash the stupid stuff off your face.
Speaker 2:It's like we can all tell it's a mask it looks like mud.
Speaker 1:You look bad also. What kind of like? What kind of treatment is that where, like you don't put water on it? It's like that's not a detox, that's like a fungus infestation, like what are you trying to do?
Speaker 2:yeah, people are disgusting. Yeah, imagine, yeah, I I've heard of people doing that with their hair too of like not washing it for so long and I can smell that I don't know how. I don't know how they can do it if, like, I cannot go for more than like three days without washing my hair. Me neither, I mean even after one day, my hair is I. I think it's like I have enough, like a lot of hair, and so it, like the oil, gets trapped in there a lot more.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so it needs to be washed more, but like 1000% if I put my hand like close to like the top and it like slides slightly. I'm like I'm washing my hair.
Speaker 1:I don't care if it's been like two hours I'm washing it because it just gets like I don't know. Yeah, I can smell it, it just is nasty, like the build-up and like just the sweat and like, oh okay, just gets like I don't know. Yeah, I can smell it, it just is nasty, like the build-up and like just the sweat and like, oh, okay. The other thing I don't understand people who I can't do this. They go to the gym and then they like come back or like they'll do like a get ready with me for work. They'll go to the gym, they'll come back, they take a shower, but they don't wash their hair and they just put makeup on.
Speaker 2:It's like, girl, your hair is dirty wash that I'm actually one of those girls.
Speaker 1:Sometimes I have to I have been in a pinch before, so it's not like I've never done it, but it's I'm very like no, yeah, if I have the time to shower.
Speaker 2:I, in fact, I actually have, like I have a problem. I really I, I love showering. It's one of those things that I'm gonna have to clean. I just like it's so relaxing and it feels just so good. Yeah, um, but I don't have enough time in my day to shower as much as I would like to shower. Yeah, and um, I don't remember what the second thing was. I think that it's also not very good to shower too much. You know, like there is such a thing as like showering, washing your hair too much, and so, anyway, I get that Like you have your natural oils and stuff, but I feel like that's like once.
Speaker 1:I feel like that's like no, but I have a hard time okay.
Speaker 2:I have a hard time. Yeah, I is it. I. I get in this debate with people all the time like how often should you wash your hair?
Speaker 1:because I am all for at least no, once a day, not at least because that's when we get into problems, but like either once a day or once every other day I think it definitely depends on what kind of hair you have, but I feel like the trend to not wash your hair, to like cleanse it or whatever, just clogs up your pores and it leaves it nasty. Yeah, I don't think that helps at all. And look, maybe it works for you. I, I can't. I've tried it. Uh, like I'm not hating from outside the club, I have tried it and it's I'm not hating from outside the club. I have tried it and it's disgusting. It makes it so my hair is like really not growing. It looks worse because it's nasty.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's like sticking to your scalp. Yeah, it's super shiny.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it's like I don't want my hair to be extra long if it's going to look nasty 90% of the time. I cannot commit to that. Yeah, it's disgusting, and the other thing I'll say and look, this might catch some hate, but I don't think americans know how to shower or clean themselves. And then they come out with these trends of like we're gonna do it once a week.
Speaker 1:It's like come on we know you were doing that before you weren't doing it right, when you were doing it every day, you weren't scrubbing. I've gotten so many arguments with people where they're like, yeah, like you don't need to. I've I've heard this from the mouths of many people and I get look, I was also born here, I'm also american, I guess, but I've heard this from many people saying that they don't have to actually put soap on their body because they'll just wash their hair and they'll just let the soap and the water just go down. I hear that all the time too, and it's like you know what we've noticed, because you smell like what's inside your underwear disgusting scrub everything I know, oh my gosh, there's even like the debate on loofah or no loofah, look, I don't care, it could be a like a kitchen sponge, whatever it needs to be, just scrub it I like the african sponges, the african loofahs.
Speaker 2:Have you seen those? I?
Speaker 1:haven't seen, I don't have one, I have, like the korean ones.
Speaker 2:Oh, I don't even know what that is, but the african ones are. They're like um kind of like a rag.
Speaker 1:Like this, bilute one right yeah.
Speaker 2:And then it's there's like the, and then you just scrub yourself and it's like a loofah, but it's not supposed to hold bacteria, because you can just kind of like air dry it yeah.
Speaker 1:I've actually read that that got debunked about loofahs that they don't hold as much bacteria as people say they do.
Speaker 2:It's better to use one than not. That's a fight I have with my boyfriend all the time. Yeah, get him one.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the Korean ones, like they're just like these kind of these rags too, and then there's like a hole in the middle so you can like put it in your hand oh cool, like a little glove and then scrub and yeah, it's great for like getting the ears, your all the stuff it's great for like trying to get rid of, like getting like strawberry legs or whatever.
Speaker 1:It's really good for exfoliating. Yeah, that's the other thing. If you, if you put your finger behind your ear and you like use your nail to like scratch it and stuff is getting under your nail you don't know how to shower and you need to watch a youtube video say a prayer, do something, ew.
Speaker 2:But yes, I feel like we need to spread awareness on this.
Speaker 1:I think more showers are a good thing yeah, and there's nothing better than someone that smells good yeah a shower a day keeps, keeps the stank away. Yeah you heard it here first yeah, there's nothing cute about having like a little green cloud for all the people around especially after the gym.
Speaker 2:Going back to that, because, yes, I agree, like sometimes it's hard to like do a full bot, like a full body, like wash your hair, like you're running late or whatever, and that's when dry shampoo for those emergencies you know, yeah, it's there, but if you can wash your body, do it, yeah, and you should make time for it.
Speaker 1:Self-care, it's important, yeah, yeah, and it's a self-esteem thing too, right, because, like, you might get self-conscious if you like you're smelling bad, you're looking bad, it's like not helping you. It's true, yeah, I can't, it's disgusting. Also, one thing I learned and this is like for any postpartum ladies too, but really anybody the benzoyl peroxide thing. You can use that on your pits and help even more. Like with the smell, because I mean, I don't know if anyone else struggles with this, but after I had kids, like right after like the postpartum stages, I kind of smelled like onion and I couldn't get rid of it. All the hormones, yeah it was something nasty.
Speaker 1:So I used that and it helped a lot because I was using deodorant and showering and all the things. But there was just like this this little faint nastiness in the air an odor that wouldn't go away.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it was definitely me yeah, there was no way to blame the husband on that one I tried, could not, but yeah, yeah, I don't know what it is, I don't know if it was like breastfeeding or something or just, yeah, hormones, but it was just yeah. But the benzoyl peroxide really helped, like, and even now, if I'm like going through a phase where I feel like there's just more bacteria, I use that and then I do my regular routine and then it just like, yeah, smells good hey, that's like good, it's important.
Speaker 2:A good little thing. The camera camera turned off. Oh why? The next thing I want to know I'm a huge advocate of the period disc. I love it and I've been trying to get Crystal to get on it too. Yeah, and you tried it on your last period, so Bought in Honestly Good Game changer.
Speaker 1:Game changer right, it really is. I was talking to my sister about this too, because I think she brought it up at some point and I kind of disregarded her because she also tried to get me into, like, the diva cup. I hate that. It sucks, it's terrible. I couldn't figure it out, it was messy, I don't know, and so I kind of disregarded her when she said it. And then I was talking to her about it, about this, the other day, and I was like I tried it, but really because you said it and yeah, it was just great, honestly it's. It takes a little bit of just kind of figuring out where it's supposed to go, but once you do, there's a little bit of a learning curve, like all night, you know, just changed it after like 12 hours each time or whatever. It turned off again.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so stupid all right, keep telling me how much you love the period disc I love it.
Speaker 1:It works so well. Um yeah, so it took me like five minutes to figure out how it works, but once I did, it was great. Honestly, even like and I know you mentioned this, but like, even like my cramps felt better immediately. I think I don't know if it's like the pressure or something, but it just really helped. Yeah, and no leaks, no anything.
Speaker 2:It was really really good yeah and it just like empties itself out when you go to the bathroom. It's I know it's beautiful, it's so beautiful. I think it's like it's one of the best like inventions for women, I know that's ever existed and we needed it I don't see it.
Speaker 1:I just think about being a kid and just it's overheating again. I I don't think it is.
Speaker 2:This is so dumb. All right. Our technical difficulties keep getting in the way of us talking about this, I know. Period discs, but we need to get all the girls on it because it's the best.
Speaker 1:Truly life changing. It really is. I feel like some of my most traumatizing moments as a teenager or a young kid was just getting my period at school and just like if you're out of control and whatever and just not knowing what to do. That is just such a good solution. It just works really really well and just I don't know.
Speaker 2:You don't have to worry about having like tampons in every purse and everywhere you go, yeah, you don't have to worry about like making a mess and all the different things. The best thing is just the cramps, like. For me it's. It's like a night and day difference. Like a lot of the time I'll still have like backup tampons. You know, if I do get my period and I'm not expecting it or whatever, and I'll put a tampon in until I can get home and, um, change it out for the disc. And it's a huge difference. I put a tampon in, I I will have cramps, yeah, and then as soon as I switch it out, it's like it's gone, it's fine.
Speaker 1:I had a friend like years ago tell me about the discs but I just saw a picture of it and I'm like I don't know where that goes and I just completely dismissed it and my life could have been so much better these last several years.
Speaker 2:But whatever yeah yeah, well, it's really nice. Now it's it's all uphill from here.
Speaker 1:I recommend it honestly. Yeah, I was talking to my sister and she was saying like, yeah, like I, I had to be on this long flight and it just I didn't have to worry about it at all, I just put it in and it was great and I was comfortable and I was like, oh my gosh, where's that? Where has that been all, my, all my life? But no, for real. Yeah, I bought a bunch. I'm stocked up forever until menopause. Freaking miracle. Do you have like, do you use the disposable ones or did you get both? Um, I've only used the disposable ones so far because I am intimidated on how to clean the other one, but I'm gonna try that out next time and I'm gonna see it yeah, yeah, just boil some hot water, just wash it out yeah, yeah, I like it, I love it honestly, it's so nice.
Speaker 1:It was just amazing, I'm glad.
Speaker 2:I'm glad you had a good experience, because I was also worried. I was like I love it so much and I've hyped it up so much. I was like I don't know, like if you hate it, I'd be surprised, but I'm not gonna lie.
Speaker 1:When I took it out of the packaging I was like girl, what do you mean? I pinch it and then I shove like where is this going? Is this just like a slide for the blood or what? No, I just have to like did you watch any?
Speaker 2:did you watch any videos or see like? I think they have like a little diagram, like it shows sort of like your cervix, like how it goes in?
Speaker 1:and just sits. It probably would have gone faster if I had looked at the picture. I was just toughing it out and I was just like I'm just, I just followed your instructions, just eyeballing it. I mean I couldn't, but I just was like this seems right, and then I just did it until it seemed like it was in the right spot.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, which is yeah, that's, that's how it goes.
Speaker 1:It was beautiful yeah, being a woman honestly I have these moments and it just makes me hate men more.
Speaker 2:It's like why yes, but it's fine and you can pee on the side of the road. I know.
Speaker 1:You could have. Let us have like one thing I know right, it's messed up they don't have to carry children.
Speaker 2:They don't have to do anything.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to lie. I was reading about this a while ago, but and there's no like I mean we haven't been married that many years but there was no moment in my life where I felt more rage for my husband than when I was like newly postpartum and it was the middle of the night and I was trying to breastfeed, because that was a whole other journey, and I was just tired with the baby on my boob and I looked over and he was snoring and I was like I understand murder now. It's like I get it. I don't think I would do it, but like I get it, but I get it and no one would even think it's you, because there's no real motive.
Speaker 2:You know it's just. Oh, there's motive. I was like I take it back suspect number one.
Speaker 1:And I mean he did do stuff for the baby and all of that. But it does suck where it's like I'm the default for everything, because my body is the one that makes the kids, my body's the one that pushes it out, my body's the one that feeds them and it's like, yeah, you could have at least like traded it off or something you know anyway. So then pumping I guess helps, because then it's like you know what you do the nights. You have the milk, figure it out. Good night, the milk is now yours.
Speaker 2:Okay, I saw this one thing that apparently back in the day, when formula wasn't like really a thing, pumping wasn't really a thing and um, some moms obviously still couldn't produce milk, or situations where, like, the mom died during birth or whatever and the baby still needs the milk, yeah, the way that they would um get that milk for the baby was through a baby goat, and so there's like actual pictures of like I think it was called like a nursing goat, and there's like pictures of babies just like on the teat of a goat. That's interesting. I thought I was like whoa, this is so cool. And then I told my mom and she didn't think it was that interesting I was like this is so cool.
Speaker 1:Honestly, it would be such a perfect moment to then again roast the guy, because it's like the goat can do it.
Speaker 2:This goat is more helpful than you, more of a parent than you.
Speaker 1:Just roast them. Honestly, I mean that's crazy, that's interesting. I mean I only could have like goat's milk when I was younger, because I'm lactose intolerant. Oh really I don't think I've been.
Speaker 1:I've never nibbled on the goat's teeth and I've ever nibbled on the goats, but but your mom gave you milk right from her boobies, I think so up until a certain point, but then after that I had to be up to a certain point. Yeah, hopefully it's still not well. Yeah, well, yeah, but I mean like I don't think it was long term. Yeah, I don't know milk production is hard, it's. Yeah, I don't know Milk production is hard, it's tough. The whole thing is just such a freaking nightmare.
Speaker 2:I hear so many horror stories. It actually terrifies me, yeah.
Speaker 1:I would hate it. It was infuriating when I would talk to anybody about it because it always hurt for me and I didn't do it for very long because my milk production sucked. But it always hurt. And I would talk to people and they're like it's not supposed to hurt and I'm like, okay, thank you. It's like shut up first off. It's like lucky you, it's not the same for everyone. And guess what? Like they make you I mean at least now they make you, see, like a lact what is it called? A lactation consultant at the hospital, like when you're freshly postpartum and she like did the whole thing. And she's like, oh yeah, he's not laughing, he's not wanting to do it. It's like, okay, I knew it was a him problem, not me, I'm doing what I can.
Speaker 2:So again, a man is the problem, I know again it's like fine, yeah, no crazy. Yeah, people are such jerks about everything with moms, but yeah, that's insane no, my, I was talking to my sisters-in-law the other day about how um their kids when their kids started getting teeth and they were still breastfeeding hell, nah, that's crazy.
Speaker 2:I honestly like I never got that far with my kids, but they like would still, even with the gums yeah, it's like I know I was like like it hurts, just like I've never gone through it, but it hurts just thinking about it.
Speaker 1:Somebody like biting your nipple and even just from the suction and it gets like raw yeah. And so if they're biting on top of it, it's like, and it's insane because, like you talk, yeah, no, women have, so have it so bad. It's crazy because then you talk to the doctor and they're like, oh, that's normal, you can buy this like little, like stainless steel little plate thing and then put like olive oil in your nipple and then put that olive plate on top of your nipple and I'm like, why are we doing this, this?
Speaker 2:sucks. I know we need like a period disc for this situation like there needs to be a better solution.
Speaker 1:I know most people are like formula, but just give up, I know, seriously. Yeah, honestly, pumping hurt less than breastfeeding. So I did that for a bit, but it's still annoying because you have to like pump every like every other hour for an hour and then you're just connected to a machine or like every other hour at first because you're trying to like, stimulate the, like the milk to come in, oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:So like you're not sleeping because you're either with the baby or you're pumping. And then people are like, can we come visit? And it's like no.
Speaker 2:It's like, respectfully, am I either sleeping or pumping.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's the worst, yeah, but it's fine. I mean it's worth it, but it's crazy.
Speaker 2:Is there any? They should have like a pumping thing that you can pump while sleeping. You know it's like connected to you, that's.
Speaker 1:I mean, I'm so naive, but I thought the one that you put in your bra that you could do that, but you can't. It leaks out.
Speaker 2:If you lay down?
Speaker 1:Yeah, you can't lay down with it because it leaks out. You have to be sitting up in order for it to do the section and whatever. And yeah, I, the first time I like laid down because I was so tired, yeah, just leaked all over me, which is so much sadder because it's like you're still feeling like the pain of the pump or like just the milk, and then losing the milk is like the most. I don't know how to explain it.
Speaker 2:it's like all that work. Yeah, and it's like, and, from what I understand, when you like, you don't, there's not that much milk that comes from it. Right, like you get like.
Speaker 1:Some people get a lot, but I never did, Honestly, like the most when I was producing, like the most I would get like two ounces at a time per boob and it's like after 45 minutes of pumping and it's so then, and that it happened a couple times where, like, I was moving it to a different bottle and then it spilled and it's like it's like an hour's worth of work.
Speaker 2:It's so sad it's so sad, oh my gosh. Yeah that that. That would be frustrating freaking men. Yeah, you don't see them offering. Actually, you do see them offering up their body, but for a much different part of the process.
Speaker 1:I'm telling you it's not fair, it's so rude. Yeah, honestly, and I mean, and my husband is so sweet, but I definitely got so like so much rage towards him because of that, definitely got so like so much rage towards him because of that, because I'm like, I hate this, like you, I will can't even contribute more if you tried, it's so annoying, I will 100.
Speaker 2:I'd like be the same. I'm sure I'm gonna be so rationally mad, oh I was irrationally mad.
Speaker 1:Definitely the person at the hospital pushing me like you did this to me. You ever. This is your fault.
Speaker 2:Uh, yeah, you know, yeah, it's all fun and games, um. But that reminds me I was reading this, um, I think it was like a tiktok thread sort of thing. That was, um, what's the nicest thing a man has ever done for you? What's the kindest thing a man has ever done for you?
Speaker 1:and I thought we're turning this around. It's like now we're gonna be nice to them. It got too dark, okay, yeah yeah we're, we're, we're bringing it back.
Speaker 2:Okay, I respect it I mean anything else you want to say before, before we turn this around no, I'm on board the floor is always open to trash on them don't get me wrong no, but I was actually like I actually teared up when I was reading the comments, because it was like people were like um, I think my favorite one was my. I was driving, I was moving away and I was on a road trip moving my stuff and my car broke down and I was really like freaking out and he drove over a thousand miles to meet me and help me move my stuff. Um, I love you, dad. Like, rest in peace.
Speaker 2:It was like the cutest. Like I was like oh my gosh, I'm just like 2 am I'm crying to my bed over this, like stranger story, but it was it. Everything was about their dads, though, you know, and I was like I, that wasn't like the intention of the post, yeah. So I was like that's actually so sweet, that is sweet. Yeah, that's awesome, I know. I was like all these girls commenting on like the stuff that their dad had done for them.
Speaker 1:And I was like that's really cute. Think about that that. Do you have any stories, any good ones, to share?
Speaker 2:I'm like my poor dad, I can't think of it. I'll step up.
Speaker 1:Dad, you gotta step up um, try to think if I have any. Um. Um, poor dad. No, I'm sure they've done great stuff. Well, I do have one. My dad has.
Speaker 1:He always had like this guitar. While we were growing up, he bought it at some point I don't know if it was like when he was dating my mom or when they were first married. He had it for like a few years and we weren't allowed to touch it and he would play for us though all the time, but he just wanted to make sure that we weren't gonna break it, because we were gonna probably had touched it. Um, anyway, but at some point I think I was like 15, 14, 15, I don't know I decided I was gonna learn how to play it and I wanted to like surprise him, but I like didn't have a guitar, so I was using the one I wasn't supposed to. Um, and he caught me a couple times and he was totally fine with it and he was like so excited that I was wanting to learn. And then, before I left for college, uh, well, at some point he bought me my own guitar and then, before I left for college, we swapped guitars, so I got to keep the one that he had forever.
Speaker 2:I still have it that was really sweet that is so sweet. Does he miss it ever?
Speaker 1:I don't know. I did like at some point between like moving from like student housing and whatnot, it like bumped a little bit and like so there's like a little crack on it. So he saw it at some point. He was like oh, what happened? I'm like, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 2:He's like it's fine, it's like it's almost 30 years old, but it's a really nice one and it works really well. But an heirloom, that's so sweet, that's cute. Yeah, that's a cute story there was also.
Speaker 2:This one was less liking my I can think of stuff that's like not. Like there was one time I got stranded in Brazil. I like it was my visa stuff wasn't getting figured out, yeah, and when it finally did, this is gonna sound like so stupid. But my dad surprised me with like first class tickets back to the US, which I like I'd never flown first class, yeah, and so I thought that was the coolest thing. I mean that is really that's awesome, that's a gift, that's an expensive gift.
Speaker 1:That's nice. Yeah, that's sweet. Honestly, that is very, very nice I know, I.
Speaker 2:After that I was like I, this is the luxury travel like I could. I would never complain about traveling. If I was traveling, yeah, first class every time, you know yeah, you just have like your little corner.
Speaker 1:I, I don't know, I don't know if I've flown first class. I think I did like executive once, it was something like that I was flying to brazil.
Speaker 2:Okay, that's my yeah, I was gonna say that's.
Speaker 1:I think that it was like a business, really nice, yeah, yeah um, I was flying by myself for the first time, going to Brazil to visit, and my dad surprised me with like first class or executive tickets too to go down. And because I was so scared and he was like maybe I'll be less scared if it's this, and I was distracted by the luxury, I wasn't even afraid anymore.
Speaker 2:I was like I could do this all day and every time you travel now you have to pretend you're scared and I've upgraded to a different level of broadness that, like nothing below this will do.
Speaker 1:It is very nice just getting to fully lay down. I had never done fully lay down, you're out like the whole flight.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you have this nice little like big enough tv that you can actually see what's going on there's nobody like smushing you neck.
Speaker 1:You know like we're just farting it up the whole flight. Yeah, I've been in some situations like it's also like a 12-hour flight to brazil and it's like, can you just?
Speaker 2:it's like a whole day. Yeah no, I've been in some flights that are just like, oh, like I don't know I you're on the brink of survival. You're just like I don't know how I'm gonna make like another five, like make it through another five hours of this, when it's already been like 10 I I know, just like sitting there, I have to get myself to fall asleep, otherwise I go insane. Mm-hmm, I have a whole, like I have a whole system to my traveling now, have you, have you ever tried muscle?
Speaker 1:relaxers I did. They gave me some when I was pregnant. It was amazing. I was on a cloud. They're amazing.
Speaker 2:Like the one the patches, patches, the ones have you? Oh no, they gave me a pill, a pill. I've never tried a pill I've. Somebody gave me these patches which, honestly, I don't even know if I don't even know if you can buy that over the counter. But it was this. This guy gave them to me and, in a dark alley, sounds legit, um and no, but it was literally such a game changer. I, on my flight, I was going to Asia, I was going to Indonesia or something, and I just put that on, like my back and anywhere. That like felt a little uncomfortable and it just like relaxed me so much.
Speaker 1:It felt like a first class experience. I need it. I need it for my sciatica so I can go to bed at night. A muscle relaxer, that's.
Speaker 2:There's no name on the patches. I I have some. I can look at the name. I can give you one too. Oh, tell me I wanna, and yeah, they're and yeah they're.
Speaker 1:They were so amazing. I like I had a fall when I was pregnant, like I didn't like hit the belly or anything, but I messed up my pelvic bone and they gave me muscle relaxers and oxy and they told me to take it together. Yeah, I was so comfortable. I felt like I was laying down on a cloud and I actually was able to sleep.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you were on Oxy. I didn't know you could take that while you were pregnant. I didn't either.
Speaker 1:but they had given me postpartum before, but no, not one. What happened now? Did I die? Yeah, do you want to just finish it with the audio?
Speaker 2:yeah, okay, um, anyway, but that was fantastic well, yeah. So even with well, I bet like the pill would be really nice too. A muscle relaxing pill, yeah, because it probably relaxes like your whole body yeah whereas, like the patch, is more concentrated.
Speaker 1:Concentrated one that sounds really nice, though, when you buy me some, that sounds amazing.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh it on. Yeah, I just put it on my back. I have, like my compression socks, a mask Fully prepped. Oh, fully prepped.
Speaker 1:That sounds very doable, honestly.
Speaker 2:Yeah, my melatonin gummies. I have to take some.
Speaker 1:All kinds of gummies.
Speaker 2:All kinds of gummies honestly, I wonder, I wonder I wonder that's probably a trip.
Speaker 1:I'd probably get arrested or something, just because I probably would panic or something. I don't know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't, yeah, I don't know enough about getting high to know how that would be on an airplane, if it would make it a better experience or a more miserable experience, because you're already high.
Speaker 1:Ba-doom, ba-doom. Yeah, I don't know. I wonder what it's like. That's crazy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Something worth trying though. Yeah, I think it's a bucket list item for sure Gotta do it at least once.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but Something worth trying though. Yeah, I think it's a bucket list item. For sure Gonna do it at least once, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's so funny. Okay, something I have not watched at all but is all the hype right now, and I know that you've watched it is the secret lives of mormon wives. Yes, and I want to know what your thoughts are on it I was entertained, honestly.
Speaker 1:I made josh watch it with me. We watched the whole thing made.
Speaker 2:I know men, I know, I know I had to force him like the first 10 minutes and then the rest.
Speaker 1:He's like who does she think she is? I'm like yeah, boy, yeah you like.
Speaker 2:You go to change the channel. He's like what are you doing?
Speaker 1:like do you want something else?
Speaker 2:oh, I'm okay with this this is okay, this is fine.
Speaker 1:I mean, if you really want to. It's okay with me. Yeah, he was butted, it was. It was good. Honestly, like, did you ever watch the first season?
Speaker 2:no, I didn't. I've seen a lot of stuff on tikt so I know like the gist of a lot of it.
Speaker 1:But One thing that just drives me crazy and I think it's so funny. So you know the original like swinger scandal, right, it was like the three girls Like I think it's Camille, miranda and Taylor, Like the original, like mom talk people. Like mom talk people. Yes, I know taylor and miranda, I actually don't know who.
Speaker 1:Camille she's like the third girl that was always in like the first few videos with him. She wasn't a part of the um swinger scandal, but she was a part of like the original, like mom talk or whatever that blew up. Okay, um, and then there were all these like random girls that they would bring in for the dances and whatever, but they weren't really mom talk. They were just like no one really cared who the other girls were, they didn't have as big of a following and and like it's not like I despise them, but I just thought it was really annoying because when the show came out, people were thinking or at least I was thinking that it was going to be about the swinger thing and the original mom talk people but only taylor was a part of it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and so all these other people are just like they only have a show because of her. Yeah, so obviously, like people tune in to watch taylor and then like they didn't know who the other people were and then maybe got to know them, yeah. But then in season two they bring out miranda, the other girl that was a part of the original thing, and then these women are like, why does she want to be a part of it now, like what are her intentions? And it's like shut up, you would not be here without her. Almost like no one cares about you. I don't know what your name is like. Literally, the original girls are the ones that are popular. I just thought it was so funny. Yeah, what are the intentions? It's like one make money, let's.
Speaker 2:This is not the bachelor no, I know nobody's trying to pretend. Nobody is even gonna buy into the pretense that you're not in that.
Speaker 1:You're in this for the right reasons and it's like you're not in it for the friendship because y'all hate on each other and you're terrible friends to each other, right like what?
Speaker 2:what other reason is there possibly to be on this show? Tell me like literally it's, it's insane they're all chasing money which, honestly, I don't even. No judgment if, like that, that is the reason to do it. I would if I had the opportunity to make like millions of dollars off of like being on a reality tv show my price is not even that high.
Speaker 1:A free dinner, honestly yeah, I mean, I totally understand that but it's also like you guys would not.
Speaker 1:No one would care if it wasn't for these original girls and so they're like being really mean to her just for a few episodes. But still I was like, and she was taking it so humbly and I could never. I would have been like, who are you? And that's why you should be on that. I don't know if I have the patience, because I would just be like shut up and then we wouldn't have a recording, because some of the things they were fighting about, too, were so you would.
Speaker 2:You would make good tv. I think interesting.
Speaker 1:You would come at them, you would snap back and then I would just drive home and leave them to look at, just I'm just gonna unpin this grenade, just throw it in, and then that that would be like your characters, like mo, you just come in, you say a few words and you leave.
Speaker 2:I know, and it's always just a shot of like your car driving away my biggest contribution is leaving the conversation.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I honestly, and I mean maybe it triggered a reaction, so maybe they're doing their jobs right, but I just annoyed me so much and I honestly maybe they didn't do a good job because, honestly, for the first few episodes I just wanted to skip through that because it's like this is nonsense and also like, if you guys are all about promoting women, supporting women or whatever, wouldn't it be such a better story like she had just gotten a divorce, she has a single mom, she's tiktok famous or whatever.
Speaker 1:She's original, she's part of the original group. Wouldn't it be such a better story to be like oh my gosh, we're so're so happy that you're joining us, yeah, and that you're part of this. Let's get to know you. Oh no, but instead it was like and I know that it's not supposed to be all about like friendships and rainbows and whatever the freaking like braiding each other's hair. I get that it has to be a little spicy, but it just made you like. It made't for the original people. They started this 100, like 99 of you weren't a part of the swinger scandal and that's what people were curious about.
Speaker 2:I honestly I hate it when, um, there's that the the fake women supporting women thing like theme that a lot, of, a lot of things try to be yeah, but they're not. You know, yeah, especially like in a I even saw somebody else commenting on it how every possible thing that each girl wanted and needed support on they were bashed by the other girls so harsh, you know, yeah, and it's like okay, where's, where is the women supporting women in any of this like?
Speaker 1:and I think it's interesting because, like there would be drama regardless, right, because friendships are difficult and like if you have different backgrounds or whatever. But I think it would just be so much more interesting for them to have productive conversations and like work through issues and talk about real things. I think that's just more compelling at this point Because it's like everyone's just so tired of the same, like washed out, like same petty, annoying drama. Like sometimes being petty, I'm okay with that, but like all the time it's like I'm bored. Yeah, because it's the same script, different show, yeah. Board yeah, because it's the same script, different show, yeah, and yeah.
Speaker 1:But there were some other things that were kind of interesting. So in the first season there's this one girl. Supposedly she's like the most mormon out of all of them, but and again, like I'm gonna sound judgmental, I'm not, but like everyone chooses to live, you know, in the church differently. That's totally fine, but I think it's so funny because they pick one of the girls as like the most like saintly girl, and she's still like she'd be. She would be considered very much rebellious on every part of the book, but whatever, anyway, she's married to this guy and they do definitely depict the mormon church in a very um I I think wrong light but yeah, in some ways it's bad, in some ways it's good.
Speaker 1:I feel like I I appreciate like a more modern, modern, more like free-spirited way of like you do what works for you. But I appreciate that and I think there should be more of that yeah, I do think, I just wonder.
Speaker 1:I just I guess what I mean is like I don't think that the way they live truly reflects what the mormon church at least, tries to be a hundred percent and I don't know how things are now, but I feel like if I was doing one percent of what any of these girls do, at least how we grew up, we would be in the bishop's office like every week and we would be considered rebellious, like not obedient difficult. So it's just interesting how and I don't know how they're perceived or how things are going or whatever, but I just think it's interesting to portray, portray it that way because I feel like it would never be accepted, at least in the framework that I know the church, but that's a whole other that's a whole other can of worms but there's this one girl.
Speaker 1:She's married to this guy apparently. He's like super, super traditional, and so is his, so is his family, and she and the girls go to vegas. And this happens again in the first season oh yeah, I remember you've heard of that.
Speaker 1:Okay, yes they go, they take her to chippendales or whatever. I didn't know what. It was. Funny enough josh did so. He explained it to me. But yeah, so they went, took her and then her husband was like really awful, to her center. All this message is like I don't love you anymore. All these different things oh like really really harsh, like your terrible mother and he, and in the same breath he was in vegas too, but gambling in another building and it's like all right what so the, the, what was it?
Speaker 2:chips and dale chip, chip and dales, chip and dales. Is that like a strip club?
Speaker 1:it's a? I don't think it's a full strip club, I think it's just like a show and they're basically stripping down. I don't think it's a full strip club, I think it's just like a show and they're basically stripping down. I don't know if it's all the way down, but kind of like a magic mic sort of thing, I think. So that's my understanding, okay, but anyway. But I guess I'll ask what are your thoughts on that, because I had a big debate with josh about her going to yeah, like whether that's okay or not, or yeah that in comparison to him gambling um, I just like the dynamic, like what do you think of her going?
Speaker 2:and like the blow up that it generated from her spouse um, I feel like it's the kind of thing that, first off I don't know if I fully understand the scope of the chippendale thing I feel like, if it's, if it's just like one show that she's going to, it's not that big of a deal yeah um, um.
Speaker 2:But also if it's something that their lifestyle and them as a couple they've agreed that they wouldn't do things like that, yeah, which I feel like is context that we may not be privy to, and I don't know if that even is an applicable context. Maybe they've never even had conversations about it. But if that is a kind of thing that they've agreed not to do and then she goes and does it, then I would have a problem with it.
Speaker 1:Yeah no, I agree, I was talking to josh about it and I was like, well, first off, I was explaining I don't know explaining to him, I guess, what the girl perspective of his of it is too, because like a guy going to the strip club, he's getting a boner, whatever it is you know what I mean a girl.
Speaker 1:It's like we're going more laughing yeah, because it's hysterical, we're not getting turned on. It's more like funny. Yeah, I was trying to explain to him with that experience. It's like, not that I've done it, but it's just like I can only even just seeing it on tv. I was like it's not like I'm drooling, it's like this is ridiculous. Yeah, and maybe that's disrespectful to the profession, I don't know, but it's just like a different vibe.
Speaker 2:It's a different kind of entertaining yeah, you're not going there to like get off.
Speaker 1:You're like going there to have like a fun time with your friends and just giggle and just be like, yeah, maybe he's hot, but it's not like getting a reaction on my body for it, it's just like other than this is funny right right anyway.
Speaker 1:So I was talking to him about that. But also I totally agree, and I think some of the other girls definitely have a different dynamic with their spouse where, like their, their spouses are totally fine with them going to stuff like that because they've talked about it, and I think that's fine. If you guys have agreed that that, you know, is not a boundary, I I agree that that's fine. But, like I also do agree that even though you might have different perspectives or whatever, if you've talked to your spouse about it and you've agreed together to not do it, I think it's a betrayal to go and do it In the situation she was kind of tricked into going by her friends, but she could have left, you know, if that was something that they had agreed on.
Speaker 2:Just because and again, it's a different situation, but like I would have an issue with my husband if he went with strip club or something, oh that would be a different situation altogether, but also, like we've agreed that that's not something that we do, right.
Speaker 1:So, but also it's not the type of thing that you would send each other texting I don't love you anymore, or whatever no sitting down like hey, this is the boundary we set, yeah, and you crossed it.
Speaker 2:And like I want to understand why yeah, and I do honestly and I'm okay with getting like hate for this, but I feel like that is the kind of environment and the kind of activity that, out of respect to your spouse, you should check in with them. Like, hey, would you be okay with me going to and like not in front of your other people.
Speaker 1:It's like a private conversation so you're not like coercing them into a situation they don't want. Yeah, totally with me going to and like not in front of your other people. It's like a private conversation, so you're not like coercing them into a situation they don't want.
Speaker 1:Yeah, totally, and I agree because I would expect the same respect back. Yeah, anyway, but also I don't appreciate like some of the other girls in the group being like, well, he has to be okay with it and it's like no one has to be okay with anything Like consent goes all the ways. You know, everyone gets to agree to things on their own terms.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, he, the reaction, I. It's like the kind of thing I see, I feel like I see this happen a lot between couples, where it's like one person does something that isn't okay, you know, within the context of the relationship, or like one person is kind of in the wrong, but then the other person, the way they react, puts them in the wrong as well, you know, and so it's like both people are in the wrong and then you're like uh, but neither one of you are really right, you guys aren't communicating or there's something missing. But and that kind of feels like it fits into this where his reaction to the situation doesn't help him in any way, like yeah, no, I agree.
Speaker 1:And I think like it seems like she's like not okay with the gambling and he was going and doing that. So it's like you know, we're all crossing boundaries and so you have to have a conversation. Anyway, they went through therapy, I don't know all that went on, but like in the second season there's like a halloween party and then these two girls from the group make their husbands dress like the chippendale people they fly in a stripper from or a performer from them, and then they put her on this. Well, they asked her hey, we're gonna, we're thinking of doing this, having the men dance during the Halloween party. And she's like, oh, that's cool, like I think you know that sounds fun.
Speaker 1:But then at the party they put her on the seat and then had the men dance on her and then they basically were flipping on her saying she had agreed to that, but and they showed the footage but they she very clearly clearly agreed to having them dance there at a party that's not a party she's throwing and like making it seem like she's gonna be okay with it. She didn't agree to anybody like dancing on her, yeah, and so it was just kind of a crazy dynamic too, and it had only been a few months, and it's like, okay, this couple is in therapy, but they have not worked through this.
Speaker 1:Yeah, now you're putting them on the spot and having your husband's dance on her like evil, right, and then they were just trying to defend it like oh, it's like exposure therapy or whatever. And I'm like who? You're not her therapist? And like I get that you're trying to make a show, but I feel like this is too far. Like these are real people and they're married and they have kids Like, and they have stuff to like work through. But like why would you like try to like throw a grenade in their relationship? I just thought it was so toxic. And they were like defending it because they're like well, you have, they have to be, he has to be okay with it, and it's like he doesn't have to be okay with anything. If they agree as a couple. That's not something. And I'm not saying like obviously she has to feel comfortable too in the whatever they agree on. Yeah, but if they together agree that that's not something that they're gonna do. You should respect that. That's okay. Like that's a choice too. Everyone gets a choice.
Speaker 1:I just thought it was really annoying and they were just trying to like start shiz which I I guess for the show. But it was also like, if this is real at all, like you guys are bad friends, yeah, like, why would you ever, especially when you know like they're going through therapy?
Speaker 2:they're working through this.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's definitely you're trying to get a reaction or a fight out of them. Uh-huh, that's the only reason you would do that. It's a very bad look for them. Yeah, I thought it was really annoying. Yeah, anyway, there's a lot I could skip through. There was some nonsense, but essentially, like the last bit of it is this one girl, this rando, trying to kick out taylor from the group, saying trying to become the leader and and like I think it's real, because she seems annoying as hell is it?
Speaker 1:the me, yeah, girl, and the girl from this first season.
Speaker 1:This is the other thing that really pissed me off, and again, it might be all fake, but in the first season whitney was like the mean girl. She was like starting stuff and kind of annoying, and so she got kicked out of the group basically. And so then the season two she's trying to come back in and so the way that she does it is she kind of like makes friendships with the newer people on the side and this Demi person and tries to be brought in and they try to like vote her in at some point, or she asks them to vote her in and no one says yes, except Taylor, and she says I think she deserves a second chance, like Taylor. And she says I think she deserves a second chance, like I think she's, you know, she wants to be here. And then later in the season, as this Demi girl is being super evil trying to kick Taylor out, whitney sides with this Demi girl and like yeah, we should get Taylor off and it's like, wow, you're a bad person.
Speaker 2:I just think it's so funny that they're like voting each other out out of like mom talk, or out of what?
Speaker 1:out of? Yeah, I guess out of mom talk out of the show. They were trying to get her kicked out of the show and I know it sounds really stupid because it is but also it's like they're trying to get her like the semantics or whatever when you get into it. They're trying to get her like fired right, she's not getting another deal for, which is like messed up.
Speaker 2:But I wonder how much? Yeah, but I wonder how much like, how much that actually like, does it?
Speaker 1:yeah, because at the end of the day, doesn't it come down to just like what the producers choose and like if this is giving context to like drama, and then this is they need a villain, yeah, and then the best villain would be somebody who's trying to get I think so, but I think in her head she was making taylor the villain, because she was like trying to say all these things about her and whatever, and paint this picture of her and I, I don't know my. My take on reality tv is that like it's really produced, but it's like usually like people's real colors tend to come out and because it's triggering like real emotions, but so that's kind of how it came across to me, like she was just like she had an opportunity to maybe have like a bigger contract next time. If she like makes her seem bad enough that like she shouldn't have an audience or a platform and I was like shut up Again.
Speaker 1:It's like who are you? Everyone watches it because of her, like right, and it's set aside because towards the end, like the all the girls are like kind of like seeing how mean this girl is being and they're like no, I don't agree with that. We shouldn't kick her out. Like you know, she didn't do anything bad. She like posted a petty thing. She got invited to host this like ama thing, this award thing, taylor, taylor, that okay. And then, like no one congratulated, congratulated her on her post from the group I don't know, within like a day, which again, super petty. So she posted a story saying I feel like they need real problems. I know they have, like some. There's definitely some things that are real but yeah, they.
Speaker 1:She posted a story saying like when no, no one from mom talk like congratulates you, and I guess some people went and like messaged these other girls being like you guys are bad friends and so that was the reason she's trying to get her kick off kicked off because she's like impulsive and mean and all these different things, when it's like it was petty but it was stupid and also no one was talking about you guys, and then she did that and then some people were like wow, that was petty, and started talking about you guys again. Yeah, it like makes it relevant, uh-huh, so like, and that's what she does all the time. It's like petty or silly or impulsive things and that's why people like her, because it's like a little dramatic, it's not crazy she gives the people just enough controversy yeah anyway.
Speaker 1:So they were like trying to frame her as like a bad person because she did that, because she has so many followers and she sent her minions to like hate on the other girls and it's like, girl, be real.
Speaker 2:She got engagement on your page and like who cares and you're getting the money from it. I know, yeah. See, my take on reality TV is just usually that it's just all fake. I have?
Speaker 1:yeah, and it might be. Yeah, I think they get like pay people to act a certain way and emphasize other things to then start the pot, like one of the girls was struggling with fertility and then the other one definitely got paid to bring in like pregnancy tests so they could do pregnancy roulette and they knew two of the girls were pregnant to get the other girl to cry yeah, have you watched?
Speaker 2:I think we might have talked about this. Uh, what was it called unreal? I think that's what it's called and ever since watching that, I like obviously that is not real, but it just to me. After watching it, I I was like I I think that is probably a lot of what reality tv is actually like, where everything is just like highly produced and highly edited edited it did too yeah, um, I agree which, yeah, but like I get the entertainment value of reality tv because it's still like, it's still something Triggers emotions.
Speaker 2:Yeah triggers emotions and it's like everything else is fake too. Yeah, but I do get so annoyed with people the people that I see that debate it so heavily or get watching it. They get like so so invested in who's right and who's wrong when it's like, honestly, probably at the end of the day they are all just laughing at us because we're buying in to whatever like drama they're curating totally.
Speaker 1:I think the. I don't really know how it works, but it almost seems to me like a couple, a few people get paid to do certain things in certain situations and there's a few people that are not in the know and then they become the victims in the in that take or whatever, and so that's how you get, like, some of the reactions that here and there that are real, but there's definitely a lot of things that are fake, I don't know. There's also okay this. This is unrelated, but I felt like this was so exploitive and I guess exploitative or however you say it, and I know that she agreed to it but there's this one girl who she got like sexually abused when she was younger and they made her like do a therapy session that they recorded and put it on the show in season two. I thought that was such a like poor taste.
Speaker 2:yeah that it was like I don't know.
Speaker 1:Like in my brain I'm like how did they rationalize this? Like maybe they're trying to make people feel more comfortable. Maybe people, like that, fear going into therapy. They want to like normalize that setting for people or something but it's also like I just felt dirty, I just felt so uncomfortable it's like an invasion of privacy.
Speaker 2:It feels like yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's just never appropriate and I feel like it's not done very much because of that, because it doesn't land. It doesn't land well.
Speaker 2:Because it is like you're trying to.
Speaker 1:you're trying, you're using a very sensitive topic and a very sensitive setting to promote like an entertainment show, show you know like, because yeah, yeah also doesn't make sense to me to be like this super petty drama, whatever show, but then try to like, flip to like let's talk about these really serious topics, about these people's lives, and then like let's do a therapy session. It just felt like, so, not the context, yeah, it's like this was not pitched by the same person that was pitching everything else, and then it just was. Yeah, I did not land, I just felt really uncomfortable by that and like there's other things that they've shared that I feel like are maybe too personal, but if the person's okay with it, it's fine, like talking about infertility. Or there was like another girl that was talking about like she lost a boyfriend, like in a car accident when they were in college or whatever like that'd be tough.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like some really like tough situations, but it's been a few years. They've worked through it, but they're talking about it and it's like relatable and interesting and makes you care about the person or the character because you see the layers. But like the therapy session, yeah, like this is weird yeah, yeah also, because it's it's therapy.
Speaker 2:You know, you're not just talking about what, like, what happened, you're like diving deep into a person's like psyche. You know, yeah, which I guess I didn't see it, so I don't know fully like how?
Speaker 1:mostly like surface level, but it was still. It was like at one point the therapist was like, which I feel like as a therapist, you should never agree to be on tv like this, that's what I was gonna say.
Speaker 2:I wonder you should know better. I wonder what if it like actually is a real therapist, or if it was just like a?
Speaker 1:but it may be, I don't know, but she like tells her, like to talk to her. The therapist as the abuser, like what would you say to him? And it's like this we should not be here for this.
Speaker 2:Like this is this feels inappropriate and like yeah, I feel like it would have been like in better taste for if they, if they wanted to include this like storyline in the episode for her to be talking to one of her friends and tell her about the experience of going to therapy. I agree, rather than the actual therapy session.
Speaker 1:Or even like I feel like there's certain topics that we don't get to know about, we shouldn't know about.
Speaker 1:Like you can know, maybe surface level, if she's okay to share that, but like't know very much about um, or it should be shared in a different way, I don't know, but I feel like it would have made more sense at least for like the theme of the show, how they go to like these, they promote all these different things.
Speaker 1:Like it would be cool to see her like working with a charity or like some work that she's doing to help other people that have gone through something similar and then promoting that charity, so like the viewers can go show some support. I feel like something like that would have been like better fitting for the situation. A different kind of promotion, for sure, and I mean I think she's gone, I haven't watched it, but I think she went on like a podcast and she talked more in depth about her situation, which I feel like it's totally fine. Like if she wants to share her story, she totally can. I just feel like this show tried to like abuse that and I take it really like but yeah, I mean it's entertaining but also kind of annoying.
Speaker 2:Yeah um, yeah, well, I'll probably. I'm kind of. I've heard so many people talk about just how it is the best of trash TV, so it's made me a little bit curious to maybe watch it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but I definitely think they should incorporate more of like the church stuff, because I feel like that's the part that people are really curious about and I feel like they just live a normal life and they gloss over church topics. I feel like it would be interesting to like give more people context and more like information, but I think they really just use the mormon in the title for the buzzword or whatever yeah, well, I feel like if maybe I'll, I'll watch it and we could do a segment or something, give some people some context of church stuff.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because we know a lot. But yeah, I think this has been a fun episode. We had a few technical difficulties, but it's been Still kicking. Yeah, been great. But yeah, if you like what you heard, follow us on tiktok at therealtsbu, follow us on youtube um, it definitely helps us out and give us a follow on your favorite platform, your favorite podcast platform, and let us know how we're doing too, if there's anything we should change or talk about. But, yeah, awesome, thanks, thank you. Bye. I think that was like two hours long.